Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen.

The title of this entry is a quote by Winston Churchill... I found it after searching "quotes about speaking up" because after what I thought was a lovely weekend back home in NYC turned out to be part-that, part secret DrAmA BaLL, I just had to speak up against whom I know was the heinous offender... My own aunt and "guest of honor" - GO FRIGGIN' FIGURE!
Call this "dirty laundry" or call it relatable, refreshing and honest (if you feel the first then please stop reading!), I KNOW we can all RELATE to having relatives or at least situations with relatives that have or will occur at some point in our lives. Never fear, you CAN take each experience and LEARN from it!
COURAGE IS WHAT IT TAKES...
I have never been able to feel satisfied with an unresolved situation (mind you some people I have tried to make amends with or communicate to have refused to acknowledge their feelings/the facts and attempt to have a rational discussion over it) but that's when one must 'cut losses' and accept that in the moment resolution may not be achieved.
Don't beat dead things, instead try to plant seeds and never leave an argument angry- even if you are the bigger person 12 days later and make a peace offering that may reopen "negotiations" to make amends lol... Which I hope you do FOR FAMILY ESPECIALLY ;) And I love you AUNTY but you said some really, really inappropriate and untrue things to me that I do hope you apologize for, because they were completely wrong.
...STAND UP AND SPEAK...
Despite 28 years of merely being privy to occasional (and still too frequent) gossip involving said aunt, I've reached a point where silence simply won't suffice. Now I am inspired to write some questions I hope you'll ask yourself and perhaps also be inspired to speak up when the time is ripe (and when you feel you can express yourself with a good balance of eloquence/tact and brutal honesty!) After all love hurts sometimes!
SIT DOWN AND LISTEN...

- Why do we accuse others of offenses we ourselves commit?
- Why do we choose to hold on to negative feelings (sometimes our entire lives) when happiness really is just one of infinite CHOICES we can make that are so much healthier than anger/hate/fear/etc?
- Why do people believe that their age is directly related to their level of wisdom or education as it relates to communication, rational thought or spirituality?
- Why are usually just 1 out of 30+ people brave enough to speak up when they have questions or are dissatisfied with something?
- When will more people start to realize that even if they suddenly lost "everything" they owned in some disaster... They could still survive and thrive?
- When will we accept the GRAY areas... like there's a difference between being HONEST and being an ASSHOLE...? (I'm guilty of that!)
- Why aren't we taught to exercise our minds, analyze our own thoughts and embrace our own flaws and idiosyncrasies that highlight our unique beauty?
- When will too much be enough?

LISTEN TO YOURSELF, SIFT THROUGH YOUR THOUGHTS UNTIL YOUR MIND IS SILENT, THEN CONSIDER POSITIVE ALTERNATIVES...
I'd have to say that even in my "imperfect" life I BELIEVE that I will always make the effort to check myself whenever conflict arises.
I guess this bLahg is one of those check points and I'm mostly satisfied with what I see...
Of course I give most of the credit to what I've learned and discussed here Greatness Begins With Thought... thanks to Vipassana Meditation because without it I could just as easily be in my aunts shoes... blinded by glitter and gold... caught in a web of drama fit for a leading role in Bravo's next installment of "Whatever Wives in Whateverville" but instead I believe I may be thought of as a "black sheep"... What I am is a product of top-quality education provided by my PARENTS, the misunderstood streets of NEW YORK and various trials, tribulations and triumphs throughout my life and travels from Cali and Hotlanta!

I've learned that even if after an ARGUMENT- when some turn their backs on me because THEY label me as "too outspoken" "sarcastic" or any other less P.C. label- it's because THEY haven't yet taken the time to understand themselves and don't yet have the capacity to appreciate or accept me in all my quick-witted, sillySOPHical, occasionally-overly-observant and often sarcastic and ALWAYS honest SELF. I think that the most dangerous people on EARTH are those who take the first step to learn about our human nature, become partly aware but then fail to value BALANCE, FAIRNESS and MORALITY over all. While I write these notes as a means to share and evaluate my own actions and thoughts- ultimately my goal is not to manipulate anyone into doing anything they don't feel is right. It's a dangerous being that tries to bend the will of another only to suit their own agenda...
I have a few times been offered olive branches... years after being scorned or battling in conversation with another, and I must say whether it's moments or decades after an event- it's never too late or insignificant to revisit a conversation and to MAKE UP!
My favorite people are often those folks I've connected with, where years could go by between our encounters and yet when we talk to one another we have the ability to pick up where we left off and enjoy THE PRESENT and laugh about the past... I believe that I've evolved from a shy, tomboy to a professional woman I am today who has learned to value self-awareness and silence more than ever, but one who will never bite my tongue when I have a peaceful truth to address! My goal is to continue honing my communicative efforts or simply surround myself with more like-minds so that I am not completely surrounded by confusion or strife! Life's too short to fight every day.

I sincerely wish that others would be inspired- even a tiny bit- by the transparency with which I present these digital diaries of mine... despite what anyone may say, believe or assume about me- the truth can be found right at the tip of my tongue and I promise, I never mean to bite... but don't forget- Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen.
with an open heart and open ear, love always,
K~
xoxo

Nurture vs Nature...

I get my best ideas at night... something about the depth of the dark sky lit with scattered sprinkles of light kind of remind me of the way ideas exist in my mind. Ideas that seem endless one moment and blurred the next, like an overcast of clouds strewn through a night sky.

As much as I love the warmth of a bright blue sky and beaming sunlight, I've just always felt a deeper connection to the night, maybe it's because I feel I can always look right into the "eyes of the moon" like an old friend. (I admit i ignorantly stared into the sun a few times, challenging it to "say" something to me, but ultimately always gave up after a few seconds of dumb bravery and wiped tears from my eyes).



I was born at 6:42 pm... according to numerology that = 3, (6+4+2=12 = 1+2=3) and I've always wanted to learn more about the study of numbers and astrology. Not to be confused with "horoscopes" as a stranger stated to me, just the other evening... "because there IS a huge difference" I said. "Many biblical stories and information have been derived from the study of constellations and the stars, ya know." I believe and accept with every fiber of my being that we are all just kindred stars in the deep space that may seem vast and vacant in part, but is actually thick with infinite connection points. Even when we are not "touching" we are still effecting one another... reminds me of my favorite line in the matrix, when the sexy french woman says "cause and effect my love."


To think that we sometimes feel so alone- whether due to lack of understanding of oneself and others, or simply by choosing to rationalize some cold, stoic, purely analytical idea that somehow we must just be insignificant, unrelated, haphazard fragments of existence... is just so heart breaking to me. I feel that quite simply, whether we evolved from some magical brew served up by an (or multiple) all "knowing" master creators, or we all just exploded from some random event... the result is still a w e s o m e! Here we are, conscious, alert, sensing, curious, weird, delirious, wild, unpredictable, flawwed, physically able creatures with nothing but potential, and yet here we stand more interested in being divided than being united... or maybe just too scared or lazy to care?

>>>(Read the Atheist Professor vs. the Student, perfect illustration on why Science and Religion should not even BE an argument... http://www.energeticforum.com/psychic-paranormal/5019-atheist-professor-christian-student.html )



Of course I speak directly from my heart and ideas of life as I've seen, touched and tasted them for myself thus far... Forgive any statements of mine that may come off as idealist or non-politically-correct... I'm not here to debate, rather to create!

What better way to manifest my own potential and spark some reaction from my fellow man than to dive right into the unknown by dissecting the known?

Isn't an idea just like the intangible expression of what human kind is capable of? (i.e. isn't a breeze like oxygen?)


When a new born baby is planned into existence, that infant will most likely be trained and nutured to be the best possible version of themselves in adulthood... So wouldn't it be fair to say that it's a great, rational IDEA to look at our own lives and EVALUATE, NURTURE and TRAIN overselves for new chapters in life, with the same attention to detail and care that we would give an actual baby?




Whether you believe we are all connected or not, isn't it a great idea to believe in something and to create? Since the beginning of time, man has turned ideas into creation, teams form and products made. Every aspect of Society is now streaming live from the very palms of our hands!

Information and action are compounding on one another and now I feel all we can do is continue to branch off of these prexisting ideas (essentially piggybacking on them) but more importantly I wish we would take the time to pause,
Take a breath.
STOP what you're doing!

Reflect on this moment. . .



Realize that you dont have to be a slave to any situation. Right now you are in control. "RIGHT NOW" is the only CONSTANT we can be aware of.

The hard part is honing the mind power that's needed to navigate the waters that we are all treading in now... To take a beat and acknowledge that if many around you are drowing, shouldn't you take responsibility for aiding in rescue? It doesn't take much energy to help someone in some small way, if you've got your attennae on to the World and off of your own selfish existence.


If a fire suddenly broke out in some random city, a thousand people all run towards one exit, clawing and fighting there way to safety, and noone thinks to put out the fire, what happens?

Is it smarter to try and survive by being selfish, or is working together to solve a problem just not worth the risk involved?

Is our problem that we are somehow subconciously drawn to compete, or have we just allowed ourselves to actually ignore our own conscience altogether?

I must interject again and state, I in no way, shape or form am endorsing myself as an 'ideal' person... I've simply learned that there is lot of joy to be found in doing selfless work, sharing information and knowledge when a situation calls for it and I just want to inspire a JOLT in your thought process... I want you to analyze your own actions and be honest about who you are as a member of society vs. who you could be.



They say character is what a man does when nobody is watching... I say- just because a man doesnt think hes being watched, or doesnt care... doesnt mean his words, thoughts or actions don't effect us all- because they absolutely do.

If you want to be proud of who you are, be a giver! Contribute your skills, share what you know, create something! Do something kind or generous just because you can. Pounding on your chest while you're screaming from the top of your lungs and standing atop a mountain of "lesser" men doesnt make you the best around or better than anyone, it just makes you a big bully. Dont be fooled by what you've seen and live outside the "norm" of what "everyone else" is doing.


If you think you're great, remove all of the people and tools you use that help make your life what it is and act as if you had to start from the drawing board. If you had nothing but the clothes on your back, the breath in your lungs, the beat of your heart and the will to succeed, what would you do to make your life great? I think when we answer that question honestly, it will reveal a lot about what kind of person we really are. So when you figure that out, is that the person you want to be or not?

Never be afraid of anything and follow your instincts. I believe that the power of the mind, body and spirit when well-balanced, can make miracles happen. And hey, even if you don't, whats the harm in it? :)

Love Always,
Kola

Timeless Travel Tips and Tricks from a NYC gal with a gypsy heart ;)

In an attempt to enjoy a pre-formatted beach-theme-magazine-style layout for this travel blog after I was unsuccessful in deleting some extraneous pages I said SCREW THIS! (Then proceeded to instead collect and publish screenshots as you can see below)... These are simply some humble yet effective time, money and sanity saving practices and habits I've formed since I began traveling more often for work. There's nothing quite as satisfying as efficiently and properly packing for a trip besides taking the actual trip! Enjoy and share them with whomever and wherever you'd like ;) Bon voyage and Happy Traveling. *CLICK TO ENLARGE & ENJOY! 8)

P.S. FABULOUS GARAGE SALE! This SATURDAY - EVERYTHING MUST GO. Meet the Renaissance Chick LIVE ;) yard sales in grayson on Yard Sale Search